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The Draig's Choice Page 18
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Peter grinned and snickered at her. “Since you were laughing your head off, I doubt she perceived any type of a threat.”
“Well, thanks for taking care of her. But you need to leave so we can sort this out with complete honesty.” Peter winced, but surprisingly left with Lena at his heels.
“Mayhap we can now climb back into the bed,” Conall suggested with a quick wink that made her stomach flutter despite the conversation she was about to begin.
“No, we need to talk about this.” Not knowing exactly where to start, she began with the brutal truth. “We weren’t married last night.”
Conall lost his suggestive teasing and frowned at her. “Do you think I merely bedded you? That I would take advantage of you?”
Realizing that somehow his character has just been insulted, she corrected, “We drank way too much and spent the night together, but it doesn’t have to be more than that.” Most men would kill for this type of out. I didn’t even ask him to call me later.
“Sarah, I claimed you before all and did so kenning ‘twould bind us together. I gifted you my dagger after making certain you kenned what it meant.” She sighed at his honest intent, even if he had no clue how much she hadn’t followed last night.
“I didn’t realize that you were marrying me, I thought. . .” Her explanation cut off before she could finish with something that would likely make her sound less than saintly. Flashes of the intoxicated evening tore through her mind, the story of how the Draig marry, the significance of the dagger and the image of her hand holding said weapon while being held high by Conall’s hand.
“You thought I that I carried you to my bed with only the intent to take my pleasure without offering you all that you deserve.” Anger peeked out as he strode around the bed to stand in front of her, his green eyes flashing and alive. “Never would I insult you such.”
But you are the only one who found any pleasure. She left that out. Sarah held up her hands if only to calm him down. “I never said that. I’ve only been trying to say that last night doesn’t have to be more than it was.”
Conall grabbed her hands and pulled them to plant the palms against his rock-hard chest. “But ‘tis more than a single night. We are wed according to custom, as intended.”
Despite how happy her hands were against his pectorals that heated her fingers, she pulled away and pulled back the bedding. The process displaced Bella, who jumped to the floor and plopped down on the rug. “There wasn’t a marriage because, well, I wasn’t exactly what you thought I was.” Never in her life would she have imagined apologizing for not being innocent at twenty-six years old.
Conall stared at the bed that bore no signs of what she thought he expected to find. His face turned back to her and she glanced away from his hard perusal, not liking that she felt far too exposed and suddenly ashamed of a fact that had never bothered her.
She answered his silent judgment while trying to keep her rising temper in check. “My world is very different from yours.”
“Were you wed?” He asked, his voice lacking the anger or passion displayed earlier. He just shut down on me.
“No, I wasn’t. But I lived with a man and I once thought, oh hell, I was an idiot and I expected what my mother already knew wouldn’t happen. That he would never marry me.” The ugly truth fell from her lips and she refrained from explaining the two other men she had been with in the biblical sense. She doubted Conall would ever understand. Do they have scarlet letters here?
But then her guilt changed to annoyance as she again let her eyes wander the incredible physique of the warrior wrapped in fur. “Were you innocent?” Maybe that would explain last night. But she doubted it. There would be no way a man as gorgeous as Conall wouldn’t have been offered more than a few proverbial raised skirts. Okay, that thought really pisses me off.
His mouth twitched, and she could see indecision in his eyes, his internal debate on what to say next. “Nay, Sarah. I dinna come to you untouched, but such matters are different for men.”
“If you start with some crap on men having needs, then this will become an argument,” she warned him. Already her blood began to thrum in a rhythm similar to the pulse-like pounding in her head.
“Sarah, I dinna condemn you for having kenned another. In truth, my hand burns with a want for my sword to strike the man who would insinuate a betrothal, take all you have to offer and then leave you with naught. Such a foul creature deserves death.” His voice burned and warmth washed over her along with relief for not being seen as less in his eyes along with the offer of vengeance.
“Wow,” she whispered.
Again, Conall lifted her hands and returned them to his chest. “But we are wed. I wish to be bound to you, for you to be my wife.” His passion was back and the green gaze glowing as it bore into her.
“Oh, sweetie, you don’t even know me.” Her smile faded as other nasty thoughts popped into head. “Don’t marry me because I am a legend.”
“I took a woman to my bed, nay a tale to be told before the fire. And I ken you quite well, more than I expected to ken my wife before marriage. You are kind, brave and just the sight of your hair unbound stirs me.” His lips twitched as his gaze roamed what had to be a massive case of frazzled bed-head. “And I hear only endearments from your lips.”
“You like my hair?” The inane question was out before her better judgment could stop it.
“Aye, my hands beg to touch it,” he whispered, stepping closer until only a breath separated them. “As the rest of me kens a desire for you I have never felt. Tell me, Sarah, do you feel what I do? Does it feel as if lightning strikes every time we touch?”
That’s a great description for the heat shooting up my arms from simply having my hands on your chest. But she answered him. “Yes, I feel it too and have never known anything even remotely close to it.”
“You are here for me.” His whisper tickled her forehead and ended with his lips brushing the skin.
Sarah leaned in and let the sensation wash over her, allowing her body to take in the rush of the contact.
“I married you so I could touch you,” Conall whispered in her ear. “Your soul calls to me as does each and every freckle that covers your skin. Besides, I would never seek to take what should only be gifted to your husband.” His index finger lifted to connect freckles on her collarbone, sending chills down her spine. “I care naught for your past but only ask if there is a chance for a bairn nay mine. ‘Tis all that matters.”
While there were a few devils in his details, she began with addressing his concerns. “There isn’t any chance of that. It all ended over a year ago.” She left out lessons of birth control and then did the math on her cycle in her head after realizing none was used last night. All good, with only a day or so before my period, conception is virtually impossible.
“Then we have no concerns.” Conall brushed his lips over her temple. “I wish to spend my remaining days here with you at my side. When I leave, I would ken that you oversaw all. I would leave the Draig clan in your hands to aid Evan as he learns. He will need great wisdom and a generous heart to guide him.”
Sarah shook away the offer. “Peter will help him. Trust me when I say that I know absolutely nothing about how to do anything here. I’m even doing a crappy job of this, of trying to explain that I need more.”
“What do you need? Tell me and it shall be yours.” His offer came with too much sincerity and yet screamed of a relationship that didn’t exist.
“People are supposed to marry because they are in love, because they want to build a life together. We won’t be together. And whatever it is between us resembles lust more than anything deeper.” Sarah shifted away from him and sat on the bed, certain she’d just solved the issue. Lust is easy to explain. But Conall sat next to her and began tracing patterns on her knee, connecting freckle to freckle.
“We have more than simple lust and you ken it. Lust would be gone in the light of day. But you still feel my touch down to your b
ones as I do.” His taunt came complete with his fingers roaming her knees and sliding up to trace the skin at the edge of her bunched shift.
My bones aren’t the issue right now with the parts of me not known for deep thoughts heating up and wanting to show you more freckles to connect. I have freckles in some unique places that would love to feel you.
“Fine, the lust isn’t gone, but you will leave.” Her mind attempting to stay focused even as her senses reeled and thighs only remaining closed due to colossal restraint. Then it hit her, Conall wanted and lusted over her. Well, that’s awesome.
“I will leave to ensure our lands remains ours. No English will dare threatened our people or my wife. I go nay to flee you but to make certain all is safe for you. ‘Tis my role to keep you from harm.” Conall leaned closer and rested his forehead against her temple, his sigh floating around her. “But I would stay with you if only to build upon what we have, to create the love you need and that I crave from you.”
There it was, more than she had ever hoped to hear and from the most gorgeous man she had ever seen. But it still wasn’t enough given her past. Needing to think, she fell back on the bed and covered her face with her hands, simultaneously loving and hating that his finger kept up their touch and drove rational into hard to find corners.
“I’m trying to not be married to you, to not force you into doing what you think is right. People don’t do this; they don’t spend one night together and wake up married.”
“Mayhap in your time the world has changed, but on Draig lands we are wed.” His quick reply ended and then hurt spoke. “Do you nay see a future where I could capture your heart?”
“That’s not what I said.” Before she could say more, Conall was lying at her side. Her hand moved because it wanted to and cupped his jaw sprinkled with dark morning stubble. “If we had time, we would know. But we don’t.” The last sentence choked in her throat.
“Then spend the time we have as my wife. Let us see what we can build before I am summoned. I see a great many possibilities for us, together.” Conall leaned into her hand and his honest nature rang out.
“But you’re going to leave me,” Sarah added, certain the way she phrased it left plenty of room for him to interpret her acquiescing to his wants.
“Aye, but I will return to you. I swear I will fight to be back at your side.” His voice rang with a promise that no one could ever keep. “I will want nothing more than to return to you.”
“You don’t know that,” she challenged. “After a few days, you may be begging to leave and may never want to return.”
Conall laughed and leaned down to kiss the corner of her mouth. “I doubt such, Sarah. I would wish to come home to you if only to feel my skin sing when you are near.”
She interrupted. “I feel that too.”
With a quick nod, he answered that question. “I would come home to you to allow your kind heart to beat against mine and erase every foul act witnessed. Do you ken that the mere sight of you makes horrors and visions evaporate from my mind? I would come back if only to see the blue sea of your eyes smile at my return. Together we could build a life with all you need, and all I have ever dreamed of holding. I want you for my wife. Work with me to begin our life together, open your heart to me and I shall give you mine.”
Blinking back the tears that gathered in her eyes, Sarah stared at what had to be the sweetest entreaty ever uttered by a human being, at least to her. Her hand slid from his cheek and down his jaw to allow a finger to trace his full lower lip. “What did you just say to me?”
“I offer you all that I am.” Conall’s eyes slid from hers before he asked, “Will you have me?”
A shaky breath left her lips. You’ve got to be kidding me. There isn’t a woman in her right mind that could deny him. “How in the world could anyone say no to that?”
“But you are nay of my world. What say you? I need to hear it,” his voice flowed over her and washed away doubt even though she should have more than before. When she closed her eyes, she felt him roll onto his back. “I would have sworn you kenned my intent last eve. That you wanted to be with me.”
It was the defeat in his voice that hurt her heart because she had wanted him last night. Truth be told, she’d wanted him the first second she’d woken up in his arms and that had been after he’d shot her in the ass. Reality knocked on her muddled brain in the guise of Rachel’s voice. “If you want him, you go big or go without. On the plus side, the marriage might only last a few weeks.”
The internal whispers had her heat skipping a beat and panic raced in her mind. He could die and never come back. Despite knowing the whole marriage concept had been beyond her mental grasp, the brutal icy hole left in her heart at the mere thought of Conall never coming home made her reply with words she never would have dreamed possible. Rational women don’t do this. But then I found myself here with him and saying no will hurt him and I may have years upon years to regret not taking the chance.
“I’ll have you,” she whispered.
“Aye?” he asked with a wide grin banishing his frown.
“Aye,” she answered, mocking his brogue.
Conall laughed and glanced away from her to look at the bedding. “We have a task to fulfill. I would nay have the clan doubt you or our vows.” He rose and lifted the dagger he had given her from the floor. When he raised it to his arm, Sarah shot up from the bed.
“Are you crazy?”
“We need blood.”
Glancing around the room, she spotted a pitcher on the table before the fire and winced as she smelled wine, her hangover making a quick return. “The sheet hangs up high enough the no one will know the difference.” With a few carefully placed drops, she returned the wine to the table.
Glancing for long seconds at the sheet, Conall turned his head to give her a wide smile. “All will ken you are mine.
This is nuts, even for me. I just agreed to marry a man I barely know, certain that he is leaving and may never return. But letting her gaze roam the magnificent highlander clad only in a fur throw slung low at his hips, she doubted any woman she had ever met would be able to deny him with those delicious abdominals staring at her. Rachel would so back me up on this one.
The wise little voice in her head that resembled her mother whispered to her. Seriously? You’re going to go through with this? But the voice that had a habit of making her leap before assessing answered the question. Oh, hell yes. Have you seen him? And did you hear everything he just said? He could have walked away, I gave him lots of outs and yet here he is, practically begging me to be his wife.
“What is your wife supposed to do?” Sarah asked knowing she should have clarified her role before agreeing.
Conall furrowed his brow, making her think he found the question idiotic at best. “‘Tis why I had Lena begin the task of showing you how to run the household. I shall explain the accounts to you, as we must tend them. All within the village will meet you and will ken you speak with authority.”
Sarah held up her hands to stop him from adding more to the list. “Obviously you didn’t speak with Lena after our day together. I have no useful skills for this place.” Never thought that as a professional I’d feel useless.
Instead of asking what she meant, Conall laughed. “You need nay perform every task. Merely oversee the work done. While I will need a few new shirts before I leave, you have time to see those completed.”
The headache came back with the force of a tidal wave. “You expect me to make your shirts?”
“Aye,” he nodded to emphasize his point. “The men I have served with have long bragged over their wives’ skills. To join them again with cloth covering me cut by your hand would be fine.”
His vision of marital bliss differentiated from hers in absurd ways. Again, Sarah sat on the bed with defeat filling her belly. “Listen to me. I cannot sew, not even a little. I will not be making you shirts or anything else. The women in the kitchen kicked me out yesterday because I have n
o skills there either.” Her hands scrubbed over her weary face. “I discovered that I am not able to do what is expected of me here. You may want to reconsider your offer of marriage. Clearly, I’m not able to perform what you consider wifely duties.”
Taking a few steps to stand in front of her, Conall’s face reddened. “Last eve you performed a wifely task with no hesitation, much to my surprise.”
Please don’t make this conversation about the bad sex.
One corner of his mouth twitched up. “‘Tis why I made no move to halt your drinking.”
Blinking in astonishment, Sarah chuckled. “You let me get drunk so I wouldn’t protest having sex with you?” It had become official; her morning had spun out of control. “But you were hammered too.”
His grin faltered. “I held such fear you would deny me. My ancestors dinna have an easy road with their women of your time. But ‘tis no time to spare to court you as I should. I will be called away before the next moon disappears from the sky. While I plan to return, fate is fickle. So, I drank for courage and let you drink to give us an easier path. Such has long been encouraged by the men I fought with over the years.”
“I have no idea how to respond to that. In my time, getting me drunk to have sex with me is considered so very wrong.” Not sure if she should be pissed or flattered, she waited for him to make it sound better.
His gaze fell down to her bare knees. “I ken that a fine lass only tolerates the marriage bed.” His eyes found hers and his simplistic explanation made her question who gave him marital advice. “I needed you too much to coax you into bed. Waiting was beyond my control.” He practically mumbled, “I have no skills to sweet talk you.”
Sarah laughed at his ridiculous statement. “You do quite a fantastic job of sweet talking me.” Her gaze turned to the bed and then back to the raw perfection draped in fur. “And for the record, you don’t have to get me drunk. I’m good with wifely duties.” For effect, she gave him an exaggerated wink.
“Aye?” his surprise had her laughing again.